Another holiday I can't celebrate

It's international women's day, so I've been told. I've also been told that means I should get presents. Or, I would, if I lived in Europe. In Italy, apparently, random people pass out flowers to random women on the streets. (not that I want flowers from creepy Italian men). My Polish/Italian co-worker is making her husband buy her something.

So, pony up. I want presents! I accept, cash, check, pay pal, gems, and cute things from Asia.

I feel like secretary day, or whatever they call it now, will be passed by without me receiving as much as a trampled upon daisy. So be on the lookout for another selfish post around then.