never second best

I’ve been meaning to blog about this for weeks, ever since I saw the commercial on the Disney Channel. Finally I have the inclination, and time.

You’ve all heard of Disney’s new Sky High movie. But I think the regular commercials don’t show the horror of it all.

Disney has this bowling for soup band in their back pocket. Why have I heard of bowling for soup I asked myself, and it turns out they do that 1985 song. They also do a cover of the bare necessities song, which is available for listening while playing neopets.

And in this movie they do a cover of I Melt with you. And Disney produced a video. “What’s wrong with this?” you ask. I love 80’s fluff, and I’m happy to have everyone exposed to it. And while I usually don’t pay a bit of attention to the lyrics, it is a love song. Love. And, as love is wont to do, it includes sex. Not bowling for soup though. The fact that 2 of the 3 “top results” from amazon are labeled “Explicit lyrics,” doesn’t stop them from disneyfying a legitimate love song.

Original: Making love to you was never second best
New: Being friends with you was never second best

I know they're Disney, but even they have some explaining to do. Someone has to hold them accountable. This is just as bad as when they take love songs, substitute the word "God" and pass it off as religious.

Now, the whole soundtrack is covers of mostly legit, grown up songs. I can only wonder what other horrors are hidden. Here's my 5 minutes of research list of objectionable things

And she was: she was taking off her dress--- can’t encourage that
Please, Please Please Let Me Get What I Want: Lord knows, it would be the first time—taking the lord’s name in vain
One thing leads to another—just the name alone is enough to send the PTC and friends into a tizzy
Voices Carry: he said shut up he said shut up---if people object to sponge bob saying it…
Through being cool: going to beat some butts… spank the pank who try to drive you nuts


I’m not sure how things work in music, but surely all of these cover albums that Disney keeps producing can’t be better than if they used the real songs from the real people. Or is it another form of extending their reach into every home in the world, hoping that people will forget about the old and only pay attention to their new.

bleh.