More people who are ruining thoughtfulness
A very long article on thank-yous: Whatever happened to thank- you notes?
Normally, you’d think I’d fall on the side of lamenting the loss of formality. And sometimes I am, but only when good arguements are presented. Or, at least when the people offering the arguments are fair, graceful and charming. But, the people interviewed in this article are big fat jerks.
When you give a gift, it is from the goodness of your heart. If you expect, or demand anything in return it is no longer a gift. That is an exchange or a trade or a purchase. Don't believe me? Ask Merriam-Webster: something voluntarily transferred by one person to another without compensation
Like the Christmas crazies, it is completely unacceptable to get upset over a goodwill gesture. If someone sends you an e card or email maybe you can be a bit disappointed at the sad state of things today. But, you absolutely cannot say that the time and thought it took the person to type and send is "’only remotely’ better than sending nothing.
This jerk has the audacity to complain about receiving a handwritten note written on the wrong paper stock:
Morrigan says she has received one such note in the past decade, three years ago for a wedding gift of a couple of bottles of wine and some wine glasses. She says the note was on a party supply-store card - "no quality stationery here." Meanwhile, she has given five or so other wedding gifts, to no response.
And this jerk takes the cake:
So this Christmas, she threw down the gifting gauntlet. She tucked into each family's shipping box a note, hand-printed in Sharpie: "If I do not hear a reply from you on receipt of this package, do not expect another gift." Not for Christmas, not for birthdays - nothing. She has yet to get a response, and she doesn't expect to.”
I wonder if these people ever think that maybe the reason no one sends them thank you notes is because they’re such huge assholes that everyone is doing their best to ignore them.
A thank-you note may be a social norm for some, and is generally good manners. But demanding one is worse etiquette than not sending one. Do you know what people with good manners do? They ignore bad manners and rise above it.
The other thing the article touches on is that quality paper and writing supplies are falling by the wayside. A legit concern, except that electronic phenomenon known as the internet that these antiquarians are so quick to bash is full of legitimate stationary to buy. Yes, the mom and pop stationary store has gone, but so has the mom and pop [insert noun] stores too. And, that information needs to be given to make the article balanced.
In conclusion: The week between Christmas and Jan 1 is always retardedly slow. This is not an article lamenting the lack of etiquette today, it's just a bitch session. It could have been a legit article. But, who has time for that when there are New Year plans.